How Does Psychotherapy Work?
Making the unconscious conscious
Psychodynamic psychotherapy explores unconscious causes of our conscious behaviour, with the goal of changing our minds - hence the “dynamic” in psychodynamic.
Think of your mind as an iceberg; the part above the surface of the water is your consciousness. This is what you are aware of in your day to day life; feelings, actions, body sensations, voices in the back of your head. Everything beneath the surface of the water is your unconsciousness; these could be repressed memories from your childhood, material that shows up in recurring dreams, parts of your personality that you’ve learned to ignore or resist, things that happened in your past that you were unable to make sense of.
When we carry around unconscious thoughts, experiences, and emotions, they show up in our conscious behaviour, often in ways that make us feel out of control, helpless, and angry. An example of this could be feeling completely outraged when your partner makes a small mistake such as forgetting to switch over the laundry. Or maybe a boss gives you some constructive feedback in a performance review, and you completely fall apart. Maybe you feel like you keep repeating the same patterns over and over again in work, friendships, or dating, and always get the same negative result.
When we unconsciously carry around unprocessed material, it can also manifest physically through weakened immune systems, chronic illness, pain, and exhaustion. These symptoms of unconscious conflict impact our relationships, careers, and sense of who we are.
Through therapy, we gently explore the symptoms and manifestations of unconscious material, while honouring the ways that you have learned to cope and survive. We work to bring you from a place of feeling stuck in life to a place of groundedness, emotional regulation, and self-acceptance.
We might explore patterns of conflict you experience in your relationships, and be curious about how those patterns first originated. It’s often through understanding why we feel the way we do, and why we do the things we do, that we ultimately take the reins in our lives and are finally able to get unstuck. We might look directly at the dynamics between client and therapist in order to understand broader patterns of relationship. We could also look at how difficult emotions like anxiety or anger are triggered, and explore why certain situations are so triggering for you. We might explore how society impacts your sense of self, whether that’s through gender or racial norms, ideology, or other systemic forces. We might work to accept the things you can’t control, reallocating your energy towards what you can. There are many paths we can take in the process of bringing more consciousness and compassion to our unconscious world, and we will work together to ensure the path feels right for you.
Ultimately, by getting to know the profound needs and wants that can dwell in our unconscious, the goal of therapy is to feel more connected to yourself, your loved ones, and your community.
The therapeutic relationship is key to this transformation, which is why it’s important to find a therapist that feels like a good fit. If you’re interested in learning more about how to determine a good fit with a new therapist, check out this checklist.
